When it comes to casual relationship, like friends with benefits, feelings can develop unexpectedly by one or both parties. If only one person in the friendship develops the desire for a long term, committed relationship, it can be a heartbreaking awakening. The scenario is much different if you both are feeling the same connection and movement towards wanting to take a casual connection to a committed, long term relationship.
This article is addressing how you can transition if you are both feeling the love and connection towards a forever commitment (whether that is long term partner or marriage).
So how do you know if they are interested in a long-term relationship with you?:
*If you notice that they are connecting more, calling more, texting more, and making an effort to let you know they care.
*If they start using the words love, care, and sweet nicknames (honey, sweetheart, babe).
*If they ask if you are interested or dating anybody else.
*If they start to include you in family gatherings or couples oriented events (weddings, parties, celebrations)*If they want to spend their birthday with you.
*If they start to share their deep feelings and secrets they have not shared with anybody else.*If they go from "love ya" to "I love you." The difference between the two is profound. When someone goes the extra mile to say "I Love You" it indicates in a romantic relationship and growing feelings.
*When they go out with you, hold hands, and demonstrate affection that is new between the two of you in public.
*They stay overnight more often.
*They start giving you gifts and doing extra special thoughtful things they have never done before.
*They leave things at your house and ask if you want to leave some of your things at their place.
The first step is always the most tentative:
Someone has to step out of their corner, please don't let gender roles hold you back. Expressing your feelings, and laying your cards on the table in an honest, clear, and sincere manner will let them know that you are interested. You have already seen some of the changes listed above, so take a chance and say something. Chances are they are too scared to bring it up to you.
Once you have had the tough conversation start to integrate your everyday lives:
Begin to integrate your lives into an everyday basis. Share your workday, introduce them to your family and friends. Start making it about more than just the physical aspect that you previously shared.Go on dates, and get to know each other in a new and fresh way:
Start dating, get to know each other! :
Move things into the romantic spectrum.Share your hopes, dreams, and goals:Start sharing your hopes, dreams, goals, and merging as a couple. Use plural pronouns, we and us, and start checking in before you make plans.Let the new relationship unfold organically.
There is no need to push!:
You have changed the direction of your casual relationship to one that is committed. Enjoy the process, and establish a solid foundation together. Let things unfold in a way that is comfortable to you both.
Take your time in living together:
The relationship has gone from casual to committed, don't let it go back to being casual by living together too soon. Go through 4 seasons before you move in together, and get a feel for what it is in integrate your lives.
If you do have feelings for someone that is indicating they do not want to take it to a committed level, take heart. It takes time for things to shift between you. Assign an expiration date to waiting for them, and keep it to yourself. If at the end of this time, there is not movement, walk away, It is hard to stay in a casual relationship when you are feeling more, save the wear and tear on your heart.
Free your heart for greater possibilities for there may also be someone that is perfect for you that you will meet and open your heart to, filling you with such joy and happiness that it eclipses the casual relationship you have had.Thank you for sharing this time with me, It is a joy connecting with you each and every day. I love you and I believe in you.Please give me a call if I can bring clarity to any of your life issues.
In Divine Love,