,It is a joy to connect to you in this healing space we share together, we come together for the purpose of lifting each other up. Each of you is such a blessings, and I celebrate you!
I feel called to talk about The Fixer Upper Relationship. This is where you come in and play rescuer! Offering someone a place to live and take care of them until they are on their feet, financial support, and wanting to solve their emotional problems as nobody has ever really understood them.What we are really saying is that you are becoming a caregiver in a romantic relationship. You are essentially becoming a full time nurse!
When it is in the context of addiction, or being with someone that is emotionally/mentally unstable, this is particularly challenging. It takes all of your time and energy to manage not only your life, but theirs.The attraction that you feel is not based on a healthy and reciprocal romantic relationship, but one in which you, as the rescuer, feel empowered by the difference you can make in their life. It takes away from focusing on your own growth and evolution, and fills a void within you that helps you to feel that you are not "broken" yourself. Remember the law of attraction: Like attracts like. People are, in fact, no broken, but out of balance.
So if you are attracted to someone that is dire need, has their life filled with drama, speaks about their crazy exes, or demonstrates stability issues (runs hot and cold, or whose behavior is erratic), you are attracted to Fixer Upper Relationships. This does fill a need of sorts, which is making you "feel" needed. It can temporarily fill that void that you carry within you from being a good girl or good boy, seeking acceptance and even praise that you may not have gotten growing up, Love and being a good girl or good boy were bundled together, "I love you, you are such a good girl or a good boy. " This part of you craves to feel loved, for the love that you may have received was conditional. If you fulfill this list of requirements that your family had for you, you would possiblly get the validation that you needed (albeit only temporarily satiating).
So you and I carry this with us as adults, looking for the same good boy or good girl conditional validation we desperately wanted to receive to feel loved, you and I will most certainly seek this out if this part of us has not gone through deep and transformational healing. A healing where you face yourself honestly, lovingly, and with the determination to clear this conditional energy from your life, replacing it with unconditional self love and awareness.This is where serial dating, and why people marry and divorce so many times.
When the love they thought they had becomes toxic, they flee the relationship and jump into another one that is likely to be even more dissatisfying than the previous one!
Let us liken a romantic relationship to house or structure:
If you build your home on a poor foundation, you will have issues with the house being plumb and at strong angles. The first earthquake or windstorm are likely to incur damage, for the house is not based on solid parallel structure. You want your home to be your nest, the safe place that you can relax, restore, and connect to those that you love. An unconditional charging pad so you have a thriving and vibrant life in all regards.
The Taj Mahal, a loving tribute to a wife well loved, is a strong, beautiful, and opulent testament to a husband's undying devotion. It has stood the test of time since it's completed in 1653. 365 years ago!
A romantic relationship built on unconditional love, reciprocity, empathy (versus rescuer), and 100% commitment is like the Taj Mahal. It is strong enough to stand the test of time, retaining it's beauty and integrity. Nothing can shake this love, not even death.
It is when you have really loved and been loved, that it becomes part of your chi, part of your energy, and is in your bones and your skin. It is part of you forever, and will nourish you for the rest of your life.
To have even one relationship like this is to know the love that the Mughal Emporer, Shah Jahan, had for his favorite wife Mumtaz Mahal. She was loved, and you and I can bear witness to their love today, as will generations past us.
Let's you and I dive deep, and heal the places in our lives that need addressing. Let us learn to love ourselves and to know with absolute certainty that we are loved and worthy to be loved. Let us have relationships from a place of one hand reaching out to the other, and two hearts connecting in unconditionally loving reciprocity.Let us create monuments to this love, so we leave a legacy of such magnitude, that it's beauty will be looked upon with awe and amazement for many years to come.
Reside in love always, Dear Ones. I love you and I believe in you.
In Divine Love and Truth,
Bright Greetings Dear Ones,
It is a joy to connect with you today, and to share this healing time together.With Summer Solstice approaching, June 21st, and with it a time when earth rejoices.
She shows us her flowers, sunny days filled with play, vacation, family. Working in the garden, watching our gardens grow, splashing and playing with our kids at the lake, and taking long walks through the woods with our beloved dogs. Taking much needed vacations to breathe, relax, restore, and attending the plethora of summer weddings and parties.
We are well away from the cold of winter, and if you live in the United States , are looking forward to the Fourth of July fireworks and celebrations. Or if you live in the UK, the Solstice Celebration at Stonehenge on June 21st. This is a time of family reunions, catching up with friends, and getting your body moving again.
This is the season for watching the meteor showers that come around in August (depending upon which continent you reside), ice cream, and impromptu road trips. While spring brings forth the reissuance of life, summer is the nature at her best, offering us a balance of all the elements, and a chance to reconnect to ourselves in a powerful and healing manner.
Establish time to make a renewed commitment to your health, clear your head, expand your heart energy with daily sun salutations. Shed light into the facets of your life, what do you see, what needs healing, what do you no longer need? Clear space for the gifts of Divine energy. You are surely worth the effort!I love you and I believe in you.
Please call, text, chat, or connect in an email reading if I can be of support to you. Messages of hope and healing await you.
In Divine Love and Truth,
It is a joy to share this time with each of you. I send you love, encouragement, and empower you to rise to the best version of yourself.
I want to talk today about the importance of you being in the driver's seat of your life. There are two types of people:
Those who go along for the ride, and let others lead in their life decisions
Those who are mindful of the decisions they are making, and utilize the Wisdom they have attained to be successful.
Being in control of your life, means that you weigh your choices carefully, and that you see success as having given 100% energy to your endeavors. Being successful means that you are committing to a life of excellence.
You make the decisions in your life, life up to the commitments that you made freely, and you are discerning about what and whom you choose to say yes. Your yes counts, because you exercise your no with equal wisdom. You take the long way around because you know that short cuts rarely, if ever, lead to long term success. You have invested in knowledge, cultivating your intuition, and you care about the footprint you are leaving behind you.
You are selective about your friends, and only work with experts that include integrity in their business and personal lives. You are deeply private, but live a transparent life; you use your creativity to effectively problem solve. You do not fear, you excel and are able to look at life from all angles, giving you a boldness, and ingenuity that others will admire (but that does not drive you in any way, having their admiration).
You are in the Driver's Seat and behind the wheel. You know your destination, but have an internal GPS that guides you in the most illustrious direction. You are accountable for all of your actions, and only apologize when it is necessary. You do not believe in placating with "I am sorry" for that leads to the people around you not being accountable. You will not and do not support this, but are here to empower the people around you.
You are here to inspire, encourage, and to contribute, for abundance is not about the money, it is about making a difference.in your community and world. You take care of your body, and you have good mental hygiene. You do not let others tell you what to believe, you make these decisions on your own, after having looked at all the facts.
You are a winner and successful because you fully engage in your life and live a 360 degree approach to excellence. You know that your happiness is in your hands, and you never give it over to another's keeping. You know the value of empathy, compassion, and know that sympathy can lead to co-dependence of enabling others to not be the best.
You do not give away your secret sauce, but keep that component that makes you almost magical, to yourself. If you ever do pass your secret sauce along to another, you will do so mindfully, and to someone that will respect and regard it, making it their own as they continue their personal evolution.
I have done this work for 46 years, and in all this time, I have worked with people that are highly successful in their lives and work. The questions they don't ask: Why won't my boyfriend/girlfriend call me back? What can I do to get this person to love me? What do people like about me? Why am I getting bullied at work? Why can't I find a happy relationship? Why do I always get passed over for a raise? Why do I always attract people that treat me badly and break my heart?
Any questions that smack of insecurity of self doubt are excluded.
The questions I do get from successful people:
I have two publishers that have offered me contracts. Which one is best in the long run and why?
My child wants to apply to two out of state universities, which one would best serve them?
I am going to be traveling to meet with someone that wants to contract with me. Will this go well, and should I do business with them?
How am I doing on my spiritual path?
What can I do in my community that will be the most helpful?
I want to work in alliance with a charity, any suggestions?
I want to go back to school and get my Master's Degree. What is the right timing?
The difference is clear between people that are at the wheel of their own life and those that sit in the passengers seat hoping that they will go someplace they like and where they might be happy.
I hope that this has been helpful and that you feel inspired!
I love you and I believe in you.
In Divine Love and Truth,
It is a joy to connect with you today. I wish you all happiness, health, and abundance.
Spirit has asked me to approach relationships from a different tangent today:
"How not to have a healthy relationship."
1. Text and call frequently expecting an immediate response: This will send the signal of needy and clingy.This will kill a healthy dynamic in a romantic pairing quickly, and you will find your partner distancing from you.
2. Micromanage your romantic partner: Question them frequently about everything. Who are you texting? Why were you late? Who were you with? Where were you? Why didn't you call me? Why didn't you take care of this errand? When will you be home? Who were you talking to on the phone? Why can't you bring me flowers like your friend does to his wife? Why don't you make time for me? When will I see you again? When will you want to be in a committed relationship? When will you propose to me? What can I do so you will want to be closer?You get the idea! Think of how you would feel on the receiving end of this.
3. Play games with them: If they take 2 days to text you back, you take two days to text back. If they fail to show up for a date, do the same thing back to them. This is the attitude of "I'll show you had bad you made feel" or you'll pay for what you have done to me. Step away from this, it will take you to a toxic relationship very quickly, and you may not be able to forgive nor recover from this.
4. Give them the silent treatment: This is a pointless strategy to get your partner to ask "what is wrong with you today?" When they don't ask, you will be even more upset, and things only go downhill from here.
5. Criticize their children or their parenting techniques: This will put distance between the two of you. When you place them in the place of choosing between you and their kids, you will lose every time. Offer only positive feedback when you have the opportunity to offer from a place a being genuine.
6. Talk badly about your romantic partner to your friends and family: When they do find out, they will be devastated. The damage done to your relationship may not be reversible. If you are running them down,and you want your friends to like them when you are beginning to reconcile, don't sabotage your chances to socialize by running them down.
7. Be intimate early in the relationship: If you wait for intimacy, working on your personal synergy and connection first, making love can be so much sweeter.
8. Say I love you and I miss you right away: This is one of the most common mistakes. Saying I love you and I miss you too soon will take away from the moment when you feel deep love for one another and share it when it is truly meaningful. If you say it too fast, you will question why they said it so quickly. It also indicates that they are seeking an "instant relationship.".
9. Spend ever free and waking moment together when you first start dating: Remember, you still do have a career, friends, family, and obligations outside of your new dating interest. Keep feeding the other relationships for a balanced life.
10. Make your romantic partner responsible for your happiness: Giving your happiness over into another's care is one sure way to ensure being unhappy! You have free will and happiness is a choice that you make each day.
11. Shower them with gifts, cards, presents all the time: Gift giving is special and indicates that you know what they like and who they are, so don't water this down by over giving. Buying gifts does not make up for spending time together. Give when appropriate, otherwise it comes off as insincere. It can make them feel badly for not buying as much for you, and create an uncomfortable inequity.
Last but certainly not least...
12 Talk about your crazy exes, or your exes period!: Talking negatively about your exes says more about you than about your exes.This is a red flag in dating, for you could be the next crazy ex they are talking about with their next love interest. If you do mention, please do so kindly, if you want the new relationship to last.
Thank you for spending this time together. I love you and I believe in you.
In Divine Love and Truth,
Bright Greetings,It is a pleasure to connect to each of you. I ask for love, prosperity, joy, and happiness for each of you!
When it comes to casual relationship, like friends with benefits, feelings can develop unexpectedly by one or both parties. If only one person in the friendship develops the desire for a long term, committed relationship, it can be a heartbreaking awakening. The scenario is much different if you both are feeling the same connection and movement towards wanting to take a casual connection to a committed, long term relationship.
This article is addressing how you can transition if you are both feeling the love and connection towards a forever commitment (whether that is long term partner or marriage).
So how do you know if they are interested in a long-term relationship with you?:
*If you notice that they are connecting more, calling more, texting more, and making an effort to let you know they care.
*If they start using the words love, care, and sweet nicknames (honey, sweetheart, babe).
*If they ask if you are interested or dating anybody else.
*If they start to include you in family gatherings or couples oriented events (weddings, parties, celebrations)*If they want to spend their birthday with you.
*If they start to share their deep feelings and secrets they have not shared with anybody else.*If they go from "love ya" to "I love you." The difference between the two is profound. When someone goes the extra mile to say "I Love You" it indicates in a romantic relationship and growing feelings.
*When they go out with you, hold hands, and demonstrate affection that is new between the two of you in public.
*They stay overnight more often.
*They start giving you gifts and doing extra special thoughtful things they have never done before.
*They leave things at your house and ask if you want to leave some of your things at their place.
The first step is always the most tentative:
Someone has to step out of their corner, please don't let gender roles hold you back. Expressing your feelings, and laying your cards on the table in an honest, clear, and sincere manner will let them know that you are interested. You have already seen some of the changes listed above, so take a chance and say something. Chances are they are too scared to bring it up to you.
Once you have had the tough conversation start to integrate your everyday lives:
Begin to integrate your lives into an everyday basis. Share your workday, introduce them to your family and friends. Start making it about more than just the physical aspect that you previously shared.Go on dates, and get to know each other in a new and fresh way:
Start dating, get to know each other! :
Move things into the romantic spectrum.Share your hopes, dreams, and goals:Start sharing your hopes, dreams, goals, and merging as a couple. Use plural pronouns, we and us, and start checking in before you make plans.Let the new relationship unfold organically.
There is no need to push!:
You have changed the direction of your casual relationship to one that is committed. Enjoy the process, and establish a solid foundation together. Let things unfold in a way that is comfortable to you both.
Take your time in living together:
The relationship has gone from casual to committed, don't let it go back to being casual by living together too soon. Go through 4 seasons before you move in together, and get a feel for what it is in integrate your lives.
If you do have feelings for someone that is indicating they do not want to take it to a committed level, take heart. It takes time for things to shift between you. Assign an expiration date to waiting for them, and keep it to yourself. If at the end of this time, there is not movement, walk away, It is hard to stay in a casual relationship when you are feeling more, save the wear and tear on your heart.
Free your heart for greater possibilities for there may also be someone that is perfect for you that you will meet and open your heart to, filling you with such joy and happiness that it eclipses the casual relationship you have had.Thank you for sharing this time with me, It is a joy connecting with you each and every day. I love you and I believe in you.Please give me a call if I can bring clarity to any of your life issues.
In Divine Love,
It is a genuine pleasure to connect with you today. I am excited to cover the area of love and it is enough for a happy long term relationship. Let us get our scuba gear on, and go deep into how to be happy in a long term relationship!
Myth: It is my romantic partner's responsibility to make me happy.
Fact: You as an individual are responsible for your own happiness. That is a great deal of pressure for any romantic partner. Happiness is a personal choice and you have the power to bring happiness to your life.
Myth: Love is enough to make our relationship work.
Fact: Love is a grand place to start, but more is needed. Clear communication, fidelity, trust, intimacy, making each other a priority, the support of family and friends. There is more involved that love, for being "in love": will pass and you have the opportunity to grow into a deeper love, the kind that does last a lifetime.
Myth: If they loved me, they would "make it up" to me.
Fact: You cannot make up the past, nor go back to that moment when you were hurt or where the breach of trust occurred, You can, however, take the wisdom from your past and apply now and in the future. Making it up to you is living in the past.
Myth: I can forgive and let go in one sitting.
Fact: Forgiveness and letting go happen in micro moments and over time. When you start to replay the tapes of being hurt, insert forgiveness and let it go. You cannot re write the past, but you can most certainly be present in your life by letting go as it comes up in your mind, or emotional memory. You can have a happier life and relationships by learning to forgive, really forgive, moving happily forward in your own life.
Myth: I do not have to communicate something more than once if it is important to me.
Fact: It takes awhile for you and a romantic parnter to get to know each other. They may forget that you are allergic to peanuts, and you may forget they prefer cauliflower over broccoli. Take the time to reiterate your preferences, and in a way that is more informational than coercive. Listen and share patiently and kindly.
Myth: I can make my romantic partner do what I want, when I want.
Fact: While you could force your romantic partner to do something, it does not build trust. It actually creates negative feelings between the two of you! This erodes trust, and trust is much harder to rebuild once established.
Myth: Trust and respect are built quickly in a relationship.
Fact: Trust and respect are established over time. Think of it like building your credit score. You cannot have a high credit score in a day, nor even a week. It is the repetition of wise choices and actions that create your high credit rating. Checking your credit score repeatedly (as in interrogating your romantic partner) will love your score.
Myth: Intimacy is not all that important in a long term romantic relationship/marriage.
Fact: Intimacy (whether holding hands, sending loving messages, or making love) matters! Intimacy is a state of mind between the two of you as much as a matter of the heart. It is a connection of your body, mind, and spirit. Intimacy is in every loving action, word, and thought. Tying in the above idea of you each being responsible for your own happiness, when you are both in the flow of this, then the relationship is happy and the emotional intimacy is ever present.
Myth: If he/she loves me, they will text/call/email/message me right back.
Fact: With busy work schedules, meetings, kids, and life, they may not have time that "moment" to get back to you. This energy can begin to turn coercive. Sending more messages will not necessarily do anything but put your romantic partner on edge. Talk together about what type of communication you would like to establish between the two of you before getting into a committed relationship. Make sure that you are in alignment or can at the very least come to an understanding.
Myth: If we stand together, external forces like family cannot cause us harm.
Fact: Family and friend relationships do impact you. This is one of those conversations you have prior to entering a committed relationship. What kind of family are you walking into? Will your family love and accept your romantic partner?
Here are some things to talk about before confirming a committed relationship:
1. What you are both looking for (marriage, long term committed, living together). This saves a lot of heartache.
2. Do you want kids or if you have kids can you accept and support each other as parents?
3. What are your family and friend relationships like? Are they healthy? Do you have narcissists in your family? Has your family sabotaged relationships in the past?
3. Finances: Will you have separate bank accounts? How do you navigate finances in a relationship? What financial obligations do you have that would factor into your lives together?
4. If you do agree on eventually considering marriage, would you live together first or not.
5. What are your long term personal goals as a couple? Do you see buying a home together? Going back to school? Moving up in the ranks in your job? Starting your own business? Do you want to travel the world together?
6. Your religious beliefs (especially important when it comes to kids!), Do your beliefs come into alignment? If not, can you agree to support each other unconditionally.
7. Agreeing to fight fair: Refraining from bringing up the past, dialogue when things are fresh and resolve when issues are small, if things are too heated-agree to take a time out and talk about it at a specific time later on. Agree that trust and respect are important and that at no time will you run each other, your kids, friends, or family down.
8 What is your communication comfort zone: Using statements like "tell me how you feel about frequency of communication" or "I would appreciate you sharing how comfortable you are talking about your feelings." Using open ended statements will get you much farther than questions (Why don't you text me back? or Why did you wait 2 days to call? Blame, shame, and guilt have no place in a healthy and loving relationship!).
9. Know their dating history: Invite them to share with you their romantic history. If you hear crazy ex more than once, get your track shoes on!
Dear Ones, you can have the loving, happy, and healthy long term relationship. It only needs to be what you and your beloved envision together.
I love you and I believe in you.
In Divine Love,
It is great to connect with you today! Thank you for making Spirit Blossoms Psychics part of your day.
Social Media is one of the areas that is often inquired about during a reading. If you are looking at the mainstream social media and seeing people's status updates, pictures, and shares, you can begin to wonder if any of it is real!
If you have, for instance, broken up with someone and can still see their social media pages, please realize that what your ex is posting is likely to be what they want others to see, versus how they are really feeling.
Social media is one of the places where the majority of subscribers have the "fake it 'til you make it' attitude.
Women and men handle a break up differently on social media, and here are the differences (generally speaking):
Women: Women seek support, empathy, and compassion in their social media postings following or during a break up. Women are more likely to share feelings to gain connection to aide in the healing process. Women come together to move past a heartbreak, and appreciate the support that is extended. Women also post status to see if their ex is noticing what they are doing, saying, or whom they are seeing via the like feature. They are looking for an sign of hope to get back together. In essence, social media is being used to see whom is supporting them and has their backs!
Men: Men tend to play down a break up, and will post pictures of people with whom they are spending time, or they things they are doing, (i.e. go team! Going for the superbowl!) Or sharing more male oriented items. They also use social media as a place to test the waters and flirt a bit. While women do this a little, this is more of a male dominated social media mechanism. It is still somewhat taboo for women to pursue romantic partners online without looking like a stalker (Dating websites have a different set of parameters for men and women), Men will post pictures of their cars, sports teams,and family pictures (especially of their kids and animals!), They are not looking for emotional support, but rather, showing that they have moved on from their previous relationship. Men are usually the last in a pairing to want to change their status to "in a relationship."
Social media is not the place to scope out the truth. Social media is used to forward, for the most part, our own agendas!
When you read your exes status, take it under advisement that you are seeing what they wish to project, rather than necessarily sharing how they are actually doing or feeling.
Here is where social media does reflect some reality: The groups that people choose to join and participate online are a more accurate reflection of where they are in their lives. The groups reflect an active and personal interest. The groups that you find they are the most involved with, is the best way to determine how they are feeling and doing.
Please be careful when peeking in on your ex on social media, and for the sake of your friendships, refrain from asking your support circle to do so for you. Chances are, what you see will have you feeling worse in the long run, and will create a greater degree of distrust between you and your ex. If you want to retain real hope of reuniting with your ex, stay away from their social media accounts.
Thank you for spending this time together, I love you and I believe in you.
In Divine Love,
It is a genuine pleasure to connect with each of you in the space and time of this article. Spirit has called me to talk about the mountains in the mist and how greatness is not always clear to us.I am blessed to live with a view of the mountains as my backyard. Each day, the mountain presents a different face of herself, an aspect not previously seen. This morning, the peaks are occluded by thick, misty fog, hanging heavily over her jagged peaks and valleys.I know the apex is there, for I have seen it glistening in the sun during the summer, the snow a dazzling mirror to those of us lucky enough to be in the arms of Mother Earth. The awe and majesty never fail to take my breath away. The eagles seen soaring in the wind currents, easily gliding any direction they please, remind me to take a moment to reflect on the miracle of being alive.I have personally coined this "the mood of the mountain." She can be ever inviting and beckoning, and on days such as this, mysterious and elusive. But I know that each day she has a new lesson for me, a new revelation regarding the miracle of being alive and being me. She grounds me in love and connection to both the heavens and the earth. I am aware of just how small I am in comparison to her. In these moments I feel how small I am in comparison, and by extension, the worries and cares that are within me. I am drawn to the conclusion, that she will be here for other generations, long after I am gone, and that the challenges that I have right now, will be lost in time.She calls me to remember that Divine energy stands before me each morning as I look off the back patio, calling me to let go, to ground, and to claim the love and support that is freely offered.I feel nourished by her, and am filled with awe and gratitude for the gift of being present, right now, where I stand. What is it that draws you into having a clear perspective? What reminds you of the joy of being alive right now?Connect to this as often as possible, and feel the healing that is coming into your life! Breathe in the reality of your connection to Divine energy, and offer thanks for all that is offered to you without condition.Seize this day and feel the sky above you, and the ground below you.Know that you are loved and supported.Thank you for sharing this time together. I love you and I believe in you.In Di
The Garden Oracle Speaks is a complimentary Intuitive Advice column by Razzi Lentz. Razzi has been claircognizant all of her life, bringing messages of hope and healing through channeled writings and works.